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ive never had a hard time trying to write/edit poems.
i used to say i'd be embarassed to say i worked on a POEM for a week.
its a poem.
but this is more than a notion for some reason.
i didnt initially grasp what gil scott heron meant my 'enough'
but i got it and now
i cant write the 'ode to gil'.
an ode to gil would be about what he would say if he were me..not what i would say if i were him....
i need to caputre my voice..
and i believe that is the cusp of writers block,
having lost your voice. your say

*******************
it's not enough to sit in a church and prostrate myself to 'fantasy god',
while carrying a book just this side thicker than mien kampf, the second best seller of all time
i figure one has been demonized
and the other has been idolized and since
the aforementioned are flexible in the mortalization
fuck it.
i'll take them both with me to my next stint in court..
'hell no i don't swear to tell the truth , bring me the one for the liars'

its not enough that my confidence is mistaken for arrogance and
my arrogance is mistaken for hubris which
is
in tact on good hair days but otherwise i still think im too short to be a handsome woman
and too lightskinnned to be ethnic
im not sure this is about white people as the point of reference regarding why
i've had enough, i think its about economics and the energy crisis..and the wealth of trya banks.

i knew i had enough when kwame got sentenced for four months for lying on a stand while
the child molester i help bring to light didnt even get a chance to prove himself guilty.
it was not enough when i got passed up for yet another promotion albiet i did wear earth shoes and
forgo a perm for an afro puff at the interview but
my cv is six pages long so i assumed they wouldnt see my feet past my attributes and i was hoping
my i.q. would cloud their misconceptions about my nappy edges

i
thought i'd had enough when the muslim call to prayer song was challenged in hamtramk becausethe bells
of the catholic church chime in my old neighborhood even though
the parishioners have long left the pews in lieu of less controversial prayers under lutheran skylights

its not enough i have been blacklisted as 'divorced' even though i've managed to avoid the forhanded sinner slap of any man
nor is it enough that ive endured the backhanded comments of women regarding the state of my financial affairs..
my kitchen is clean, is yours?
im not into name calling or black stabbing but if another haughty bitch suggests i'd be cuter if
i were thinner or
i'd be sexier if just a little bit dummer, im going to have to call the antibellium union and have their gingham headscarf revoked
for acknowleding an independent woman.

i am sick and tired of the in- fighting , in- racing, in -justice, in -consistancy, in -bred hate mongering i am
sick
of the uninspired trying to bound the unencumbered with unnecessary rhetoric
i
am
not
voting
for the first black president because he
is not running, a mixed race eurocentric poor(esque) man in recovery
is
so
don't blame me when the white house butler is seen serving tea at high noon to
'black man waiting in the whitehouse'.
and dont call me when your children can't get a flu shot while the first chilren are afforded flights to
the day care acadamy because i won't care.
and if they loose...you won't be able to reach me
...i'll be on the bridge to canada trying to get to my queen.
she knows the deal..nothing for you ..ever. so get over it..

how can a man call for change over and over and over and over and over and over.
its the same dammed message right?
if you find yourself getting flogged in the square of the alternative school for the disenfranchised and poets..have them
call whatever 501c3 superhero got the grant to save your ass
that year.

if i make it to the other side i'll be sure
to skip a rock back to detroit with your name on it.....
if it finds you
,hurl it at the mutherfucker who registered you to vote, without giving you a reason to.